Hmmmmmm ...

That's all there is to describe it. I don't know how else to. I learned today that somebody actually liked me. That comes as a shock to me. I don't know about you but I don't think anyone has ever told me something like that. How was I supposed to react to a statement like that? And it was totally unexpected. Tell me Jan!!! Am I forever destined to live in the dark and find out people like me after they've given up on me? Missy!!!! WHERE ARE YOU!!!! Why do you have to be in Clear Lake when I need you now?

On second thought, why do I keep myself away from the opposite sex? I don't think I've ever tried to impress a guy. I don't feel the need to. Am I ever going to have a romantic life or will it always be one-night stands? What if I really do feel a connection to someone right now but I push them away so I don't end up like the rest of the school? Am I afraid of love? Do I push myself away from guys because I actually feel and attraction to girls? I know it's not that. Maybe I spend too much time around girls and that's why I feel uncomfortable around guys. Who knows but for those of you who have never really seen into my head (that's all of you) you now know how my train of thought travels. It's like this BART train/tracks, always above the rest of the world but not always full. Yet I always leave my impression on someone or something that thing usually being myself.